tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-64456936347185055872024-03-05T06:14:10.145-06:00Lord's Joy, My Strength"...do not be grieved, for the joy of the LORD is your strength." Nehemiah 8:10KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.comBlogger49125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-3109843034210035682013-12-09T18:01:00.001-06:002014-01-06T15:32:06.550-06:00MATCHED!We are so happy to report that our long-awaited matching approval occurred just about a month ago. As of 11/12/2013, JKL is OURS to adopt!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsTO3IKUz0CQk_Crx2kwiEU2phq390dMVk9MwiuETu2jOFBuUjSz_PHYtqsdKHeJh0CIV_uArFhGrZdhKgrebyxDffuo21b4gaFpozbw3x-jkMxxh3WxeZpOSeMid-IbsrpQ6g2C32SMU/s1600/hong-kong-flag.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsTO3IKUz0CQk_Crx2kwiEU2phq390dMVk9MwiuETu2jOFBuUjSz_PHYtqsdKHeJh0CIV_uArFhGrZdhKgrebyxDffuo21b4gaFpozbw3x-jkMxxh3WxeZpOSeMid-IbsrpQ6g2C32SMU/s320/hong-kong-flag.gif" height="217" width="320" /></a></div>
The estimate we were given is that travel usually takes place 5-7 months after matching approval, which puts us at mid-April to mid-June. So much waiting. We are praying that it is on the early side!<br />
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We have been busy busy busy with paperwork!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj28jn3EHpvyZCrRwRf1jRB8E2z9Yaew2zZzoFtEC7yuC4HAiWRfcjD6vpisT-V4C8cu1ZYJoswXe3MUAIOTzjAGNL7klACRkR0E7LxdoRMN05mcBwIyiICO95N37wZfJusOCUP3z7ol94/s1600/1465192_666474798464_1538957645_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj28jn3EHpvyZCrRwRf1jRB8E2z9Yaew2zZzoFtEC7yuC4HAiWRfcjD6vpisT-V4C8cu1ZYJoswXe3MUAIOTzjAGNL7klACRkR0E7LxdoRMN05mcBwIyiICO95N37wZfJusOCUP3z7ol94/s320/1465192_666474798464_1538957645_n.jpg" height="238" width="320" /></a></div>
There has been more government paperwork to file with USCIS, and we have been working on grant applications.<br />
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If you would like to help us bring our son home, my <a href="http://www.lillarose.biz/kalliel" target="_blank">Lilla Rose </a>business has helped us raise funds to this point. They make the greatest hair jewelry: flexi-clips, hairbands, bobby pins, hair sticks, flexi-ohs, and you-pins. The clips can also be worn as scarf pins! Everything I make goes to help fund our adoption. Click on the graphic below to do some Christmas shopping!<br />
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<a href="http://www.lillarose.biz/violetcallas"><img alt="www.lillarose.biz/kalliel" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJfCim6k3Fr2x9AkAHIcFaRxlO9R_hrNJkbsmEmP3UIJ4AT5z7ZK1HSpJH9CXt2lzeETwbdcQbo5C_V6UpnFZ93rtymvh1MzHPuDRkTUdT_k1jhbisobpWDLvJmLId7u0ZT7kFmoWLH7Q/s320/1459904_572336629505522_339186468_n.jpg" height="320" title="" width="320" /></a></div>
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<br />KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-6337970302965735712013-10-17T13:13:00.001-05:002014-01-06T15:35:36.053-06:00Lilla Rose Sale!One of the ways we've saved for our adoption is through my direct-sales work as an independent consultant for Lilla Rose, Inc. <br />
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Right now, everything at Lilla Rose is on sale through Sunday! Everything is 10% off, and some select items are 15% off. Additionally, if you are new to Lilla Rose and order at least three items, I will get you a fourth item of your choice (up to $16 value) for free!<br />
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<a href="http://www.lillarose.biz/violetcallas" target="_blank"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9uobewblh94X_S2dSKWJQYxlA8EzESZjuHuKbacpycw9WO61Wxp5bHelJW3_iXssFq7f1x6r4RWhNUDu8V_YbuQmSE7ZJikVafVq8ORBR1K-nnwuPa2k0FAvLjrhnrrmNgbneyiwi2AU/s320/1374929_10151939301491352_494263058_n.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></div>
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You can shop at <span style="color: blue;"><u>www.lillarose.biz/kalliel</u></span></div>
<br />KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-4364082339102219052013-10-15T15:18:00.000-05:002013-10-15T15:18:17.460-05:00PAP (Prospective Adoptive Parent) Waiting Questionnaire<div class="MsoNormal">
Becca over at <a href="http://www.milkandhoneyliving.com/" target="_blank">Milk & Honey Living</a> has been posting this
‘Waiting Questionnaire for the Adoptive Mother’.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I thought it was great, and I’d like to do this here once a
month or so!</div>
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<b><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 10.0pt;">How long
have you been waiting?</span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 10.0pt;"> Our
home study was completed on March 28<sup>th</sup>, we identified and committed
to a specific waiting child on April 23<sup>rd</sup>, shipped our dossier to
Hong Kong on May 31<sup>st</sup>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And we’ve been married almost seven years and hoping for children the
whole time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I guess we’ve been
waiting anywhere between four and a half months and 6 years 10 months,
depending on how you look at it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 10.0pt;">How do
you feel this week?</span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 10.0pt;"> Honestly,
I have been really antsy and getting frustrated.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We were told that the official matching approval would come
within two to four months after the dossier was sent, and that Hong Kong's process was consistently within that time frame. It has now been four and a
half months.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 10.0pt;">What’s
been on your mind?</span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 10.0pt;"> I’m thinking on
where to get training on g-tube feedings and supplemental oxygen for our little
guy, since he requires those for the time being.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Once the match occurs, we’ll contact our county public
health department and go from there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I also wonder if our little one is a morning person or a night owl, and
how our dog will adjust to a child in the home.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 10.0pt;">What are
your prayers for this baby?</span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 10.0pt;"> I
have been praying daily that he is safe, his needs are being met, and that we
will be matched and travel SOON.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 10.0pt;">What are
you doing to prepare?</span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 10.0pt;"> I’ve
been de-cluttering the house to prepare for the influx of baby/toddler
gear!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve started a pile of
things for our future son (baskets and blankets) in the guest bedroom, which we’ll
covert to our child’s bedroom.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 10.0pt;">How are
you taking care of yourself this week?</span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 10.0pt;"> I’m
trying to get back into working out five days per week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I did Rip’t Circuit yesterday and Speed
2.0 today.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 10.0pt;">Nervous
about anything?</span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 10.0pt;"> Yes, I’m
nervous about why this match is taking so long.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 10.0pt;">Dreaming
about/Looking forward to this week: </span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">I am praying that this match is coming any day now!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 10.0pt;">New Baby
Items: </span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 10.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">I haven’t bought anything lately.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Over the summer I got an ERGO carrier and a Seven sling, plus an
adorable and hilarious t-shirt that I just couldn’t pass up!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was also nice and got him a Colts hat,
on behalf of my hubby the Colts fans.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Now I need to look for a Packer something for our little dude.</span><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 10.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 10.0pt;">What is
your number one recommendation for those in waiting? </span></b><span style="color: black; font-family: Times; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 10.0pt;">Pray and read Scripture. Find things to do and keep busy!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-28320854037032984082013-09-30T20:40:00.002-05:002013-09-30T20:41:19.052-05:00One Year Ago....It's about to be October and the early days of autumn. The weather is what I consider ideal - breezy, sunny, with highs in the high 70s and low 80s and very low humidity. Fall is a time to remember. I often ponder the <a href="http://www.openmyeyeslord.net/theseasonsoflife.htm" target="_blank">"Seasons of Life"</a> when the seasons change.<br />
<br />
Right now, I'm remembering <a href="http://www.lordsjoymystrength.blogspot.com/2012/10/the-news-isnt-good.html" target="_blank">this time last year.</a> It was excruciatingly, painfully emotional. Within a week, a friend of ours died, I got terrible news about my extended family that resulted in my uncle going to jail, I got correspondence from the final agency in our state that placed adoptions from South Korea and learned we would not be able to adopt from them. My heart broke, and I ran to our bedroom to cry and kick and scream. I thought that was the end of any possibility to adopt. Did I mention that my husband was gone at a conference and that I got strep throat at the end of the week? Honestly, it was the worst week of my life.<br />
<br />
Then, a <a href="http://www.thywillbedone-megan.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">friend of mine </a> posted a portion of Matthew 16:24 as his Facebook status: "If anyone would come after Me, let Him deny himself and take up his cross and follow Me." And, well, that ceased any thoughts of anger or hatred towards God. I was hurt and struggling and felt so spiritually weak, but I knew we were doing the right thing.<br />
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How far we have come in a year - from deciding to give domestic adoption a try a few weeks after that terrible week, to returning to international adoption through a completely different plan, to finally deciding on Hong Kong despite our agency's hesitation, to committing to a special needs child, to now - waiting for matching approval that looks like it will come any day now (we got word last week that it is being written, along with some updates on the child we have committed to).<br />
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That being said, my message today is: Don't give up. Don't think a pursuit or a dream is ended when all doors seem to be shut. Never doubt that our God is greater and more powerful than all things of this world, and He can use the most desperate and dark of situations to let His glory <i>shine </i>though our lives.<br />
<br />
Psalm 71:20 has long been my favorite Scripture: "Though You have made me see troubles, many and bitter, You will restore my life again; from the depths of the earth You will again bring me up." <br />
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KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-34805743645150358852013-09-15T21:58:00.002-05:002013-09-15T21:59:15.610-05:00Frugality: Living on One Income<div class="MsoNormal">
Recently, I came across this article.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It says that having a parent (but this
could apply to one spouse if a couple is childless) stay at home while one
works will either work really well or it will fail.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He then goes on to say that the stay-at-home parent/spouse
must be doing money-saving activities during their time at home in order to
make it on one income.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I would say
that these activities are simply part of a frugal, financially responsible
lifestyle, but maybe that’s just me.</div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
At any rate, we have lived on one income for the majority of
our marriage.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For the first three
and a half years, I worked while my husband attended (tuition-free) Seminary
and studied for hours after class.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>After that we moved for his vicarage. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>During that time, our rent and utilities were covered by the
church, and our health insurance premiums were covered by the Seminary.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I worked part-time at the church
preschool.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After tithing and
taxes, all of my salary went into our adoption fund. Now, he is a pastor and I
work part-time (I worked full-time as school was in session for the past two
years).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We have continued to live
on his salary while saving all of mine.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
With this method, we have saved over $25,000 over the past
three years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Our adoption costs
are estimated to add up to about that much, so now we are saving all my salary
towards our next car (mine will need to be replaced in the next few years).</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Here are “money-saving tips”, or simple frugal practices,
that have worked for us over the years:</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-Budgeting.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My
DH is SO GOOD at this.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He sets a
budget and we both stick to it.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-Home haircuts for DH.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-Home haircuts for me, or very minimal salon cuts (by minimal
I mean like twice a year trims).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>No extras like highlights (I did get them once as a birthday present) on
a regular basis.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-Making homemade laundry soap and other homemade cleaning
products.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-I make my own deodorant now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-I use shampoo/conditioner every second or third day, and
alternate with baking soda/vinegar or a homemade dry shampoo mix.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-Asking for new clothes or gift cards to buy new clothes for
birthdays and Christmas.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-Minimal vacations, except to see family.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-Not getting alcohol on a regular basis, whether from the
store or when out to eat.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-Minimal eating out.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-Making meal plans and grocery lists.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-Buying simple food – we eat lots of chicken and eggs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have never bought steak or anything
luxurious like that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I guess it
helps that we’re allergic to shellfish.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-Baking things from scratch.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-We generally use our credit card for everything.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This is an easy way for my husband to
track our spending and making sure we are staying within our monthly budget.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Plus, we get rewards points, which are
a nice bonus!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I know there are
mixed opinions out there on credit cards and stewardship, but it works for us
because we have literally never had a balance or late payments.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We have always been able to stay on
budget using plastic.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-Buying used vehicles (I admit, our parents helped out a bit
here) that we could pay cash for.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-Utilizing cheap entertainment – we like watching a movie,
going for walks or hikes, and reading books.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-Avoiding a gym membership by getting workout DVDs that can
be used over and over again.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-I’ve sewed or crafted lots of Christmas and birthday
presents.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-Only going to the doctor if we are seriously ill, i.e. a
sliced hand, strep throat, or when DH had a nasty -flu and ended up rather
dehydrated and needing IV fluids.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><br /></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>What We Haven’t Done</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>(Disclaimer: I include these methods, not to knock them or those who use them, but to help demonstrate that what works for one family doesn't work for everyone.)</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-Coupons.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For
quite awhile we couldn’t even afford a Sunday paper subscription to cut
coupons.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When I was able to get
ahold of one, it seemed like I would just buy stuff that was a good deal, and
not because we needed it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I ended
up wasting money on things that weren’t good for us, that we didn’t use or
didn’t need.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Our grocery bills
were lower when we didn’t coupon.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-“Get paid to shop” apps.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have a couple friends that do eBates or iBotta, etc, but I
just haven’t.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Again, it feels like
I would spend money to get money back, which isn’t good stewardship.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-Cut certain extras.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>We do have internet (which I consider a necessity as we live six hours
away from our closest family and don’t have friends in this area) and
cable.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I would love to try
dropping the cable, but DH refuses.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>As long as we can afford it....</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
-Government assistance.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>We may have qualified at some point, but we sure don’t now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We would have to be pretty desperate to
go down this road. </div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
What frugal tips do you have for saving money? </div>
KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-80843608714075447942013-08-29T14:35:00.001-05:002013-08-29T14:35:48.115-05:00Whole30 – Long-Overdue Update!<div class="MsoNormal">
So much for updating along the way with our Whole30
challenge!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We finished several
weeks ago, went back to eating forbidden foods (on a very limited basis) for a
little over a week, and now are back on Whole30 with a few exceptions.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My goals, and reflections are listed below:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background: white; mso-bidi-font-size: 13.0pt;"><br /></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background: white; mso-bidi-font-size: 13.0pt;">1. Cut out the
cravings for sugar and grease.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-font-size: 13.0pt;">This
was the biggest change that I noticed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I still long for fat and sweets; however, when I did indulge afterward
they tasted completely different.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Coca-Cola was disgustingly metallic, my oatmeal peanut butter snack bars
were overly rich, and a brownie in a mug was grossly sweet.</span><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 13.0pt;"><br />
<br />
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background: white;">2.
Cleanse!</span></i></span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> </i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Yeah.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Eat
ground flax meal on a regular basis and you will be cleansed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We added a tablespoon of flax to our
smoothies, and I rolled chicken or tilapia in flax, then cooked the meat in
coconut or olive oil.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Delicious
and very high in fiber!<span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 13.0pt;"><br />
<br />
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background: white;">3. To
identify any other dietary headache triggers that one or both of us may have.</span></i><span style="background: white;"> <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">(I have already
identified MSG, aspartame, and excessive food coloring such as in Skittles as
my migraine triggers)<o:p></o:p></i></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-font-size: 13.0pt;">I
didn’t find any other triggers, and still got headaches.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This revelation was frustrating, but at
the same time, it’s good to know that I can’t do any more, diet-wise, to reduce
my migraines.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I hypothesize that
the remainder of my headaches are due to things like weather (barometric
pressure/humidity) and hormone cycles.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Unfortunately, these cannot be controlled.</span><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 13.0pt;"><br />
<br />
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background: white;">4.
Segway into a healthier way of eating. We pretty much eat a
standard American diet, save for avoiding the items I listed above in number
three. I think we each manage about one vegetable and one-two fruits per
day, and I want to do better than that.</span><br style="mso-special-character: line-break;" />
<!--[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]--><br style="mso-special-character: line-break;" />
<!--[endif]--><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 13.0pt;">Done.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My cart at the grocery store is now
loaded with fresh produce, meat, frozen fruit, and eggs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I use almond milk instead of cow’s milk
for cooking.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will eat cheese
once or twice per week, but it’s a small amount, and way less than
pre-challenge.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We don’t buy soda,
flour, or sugar anymore.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 13.0pt;"><br />
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background: white;">5. Get
better sleep. I've testimonials of other people that have conquered this
challenge and said they slept much better on this diet. Since I still
struggle with insomnia now and then, that'd be nice</span></i><span style="background: white;">.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-font-size: 13.0pt;">I
saw no change in my sleep.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Disappointing, but again, I guess it’s good to know that I can’t do anything
else with my diet to fix my insomnia.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-font-size: 13.0pt;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-font-size: 13.0pt;">One
unexpected quality that I gained from this challenge is confidence in the
kitchen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve been less afraid to
experiment in the kitchen, and have had to force myself to learn how to work
with unfamiliar ingredients such as flax seed, coconut flour, etc.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-font-size: 13.0pt;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-font-size: 13.0pt;">Our
workout challenge (Focus T25) is going great!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I feel so strong and am really seeing better muscle
tone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We are on week seven of ten.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m both looking forward to the end and
worrying about how to continue this level of fitness.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background: white; font-family: "Century Schoolbook"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;">Between the two challenges, I lost eight and
a half pounds during the first week and about two more in following weeks. I gained a few during our week off and
am still working on getting back to that initial number I lost, plus lose more!</span><!--EndFragment-->
KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-82993764326542336792013-08-29T14:13:00.003-05:002013-08-29T14:13:58.043-05:00Adoption Update: Waiting to be Matched<div class="MsoNormal">
I feel like I need to apologize for the lack of
updating.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>At the same time,
apologizing seems silly because there really hasn’t been much to update anyone
one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We did receive “supplemental questions for matching approval”
from the Hong Kong government’s adoption unit on August 2<sup>nd</sup>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They wanted more information, such as
photos of the inside of our home; a picture of our dog, how big she is, and how
she handles children; more information about our community, etc.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think we received it on a Friday, I
tackled it over the weekend and our Hong Kong worker had it by Monday
morning.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The good news is, our
paperwork is being processed, and hopefully we have an answer soon.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Obviously, it is hard to wait.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t feel nervous 24/7, but my heart does a little jump
every time the phone rings, and every time I check e-mail I’m hoping for a
message from our agency’s Hong Kong worker.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Matching could happen any day now….</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
While we wait, I am praying.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I pray that ‘our’ little one will be matched with us SOON,
that he is safe, and that his needs are being met.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
In other news…I’m back to work. Thankfully, my request to be
part-time this year was honored!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
go in on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I love that I have plenty of time to prepare healthy food, clean, work
out, bond with our little beagle, etc.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The time has even been found to play piano and read for fun. I need to
turn off the TV more often and make time for those hobbies.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My husband is just keeping busy with
two churches.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>His busy season
(school year) is about to start, so we are trying to lay low and conserve our
energy.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In closing, I have been reflecting on Ecclesiastes 3:11 lately - "<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 16px;">He has made everything </span><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 16px;">beautiful</span><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 16px;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 16px;">in</span><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 16px;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 16px;">its</span><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 16px;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 16px;">time</span><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 16px;">. Also, He has put eternity </span><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 16px;">in</span><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 16px;">to man's heart, yet so that he cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end." </span></i></span></div>
KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-83788400322980078992013-07-14T19:46:00.001-05:002013-07-14T19:46:26.272-05:00Hows and Whys of Whole30I briefly mentioned in my last post that my husband and I are embarking on a <a href="http://whole9life.com/2012/01/whole-30-v2012/" target="_blank">Whole30 Challenge</a> starting today. I feel like I have already learned quite a bit and identified what the greatest challenges will be for us on this journey. But first, let me explain what it is and why we're doing this.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://whole9life.com/2012/01/whole-30-v2012/" target="_blank">Whole30</a> seems to be a combination of the whole foods and paleo diets. Sugars, grains, gluten, artificial sweeteners, preservatives, dairy, additives, and probably a few other things that I'm forgetting ;) are not allowed. I first read about it on another blog, desired to try it, but didn't think my husband would be up for it. I know from past experience that it just does not work for us to be eating two completely different ways. It's too hard for me to watch him eat something I can't have, takes too much time to cook two different meals, and it's usually double the dishes (and we do not have a dishwasher).<br />
<br />
However, we had previously agreed to do the <a href="http://www.beachbody.com/product/fitness_programs/focus-t25-workout.do" target="_blank">Focus T25</a><span id="goog_1655114729"></span><span id="goog_1655114730"></span><a href="http://www.blogger.com/"></a> exercise challenge by Beachbody to try and lose our vacation weight and tone up. DH mentioned that he would like to try some kind of healthy, cleansing diet during the workout challenge, I showed him the Whole30 page, and here we are!<br />
<br />
Our goals for this dietary challenge are not just weight loss - besides, it probably wouldn't be accurate as we're doing the exercise challenge at the same time. We <i>are</i> hoping to:<br />
<br />
1. Cut out the cravings for sugar and grease.<br />
<br />
2. Cleanse! <br />
<br />
3. To identify any other dietary headache triggers that one or both of us may have. (I have already identified MSG, aspartame, and excessive food coloring such as in Skittles as my migraine triggers)<br />
<br />
4. Segway into a healthier way of eating. We pretty much eat a standard American diet, save for avoiding the items I listed above in number three. I think we each manage about one vegetable and one-two fruits per day, and I want to do better than that.<br />
<br />
5. Get better sleep. I've testimonials of other people that have conquered this challenge and said they slept much better on this diet. Since I still struggle with insomnia now and then, that'd be nice.<br />
<br />
I think the hardest thing for me to give up is cheese (I'm from Wisconsin, what can I say?) :) For my hubby, it's soda. I also got a sudden, strong craving for hot, fresh homemade bread smothered with butter in the middle of church today... :)<br />
<br />
Reflections from Day One - I feel good, actually. I've eaten about 1200 calories worth of fruit, veggies, eggs, and meat. The challenges of this are going to be that it's expensive, the planning and prep required for every meal and snack, and there are more dishes to do.<br />
<br />
I hope to post updates along the way, and share the end results!KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-55221977237529023902013-07-11T18:04:00.000-05:002013-07-13T19:14:38.292-05:00Yummy RecipesToday's post will be a light-hearted, fun deviation from the norm around here :)<br />
<br />
Thursdays are my 'cleaning day', so I tackled that this morning. This afternoon, I decided to try a new pie recipe for dessert. I had originally planned to make this on Sunday, but we're starting a <a href="http://whole9life.com/2012/01/whole-30-v2012/" target="_blank">Whole30 </a>challenge on Monday, and I didn't want to have to throw away any leftovers. I had my favorite dinner planned for tonight, and figured this would be an excellent follow-up.<br />
<br />
First, the meal. Chicken enchiladas. I'm not a fan of the typical red enchilada sauce, but these don't call for any. I stumbled across this in one of my church cookbooks awhile ago, and it's been a favorite ever since! <br />
<br />
Chicken Enchiladas<br />
3/4 cup shredded cooked chicken<br />
2 T (or more) green chiles<br />
3 oz. cream cheese, softened<br />
1 C shredded mozzarella cheese<br />
1/2 C milk<br />
4 flour tortillas (I make mine from scratch)<br />
Optional: sour cream<br />
Combine
chicken, chiles, and cream cheese.
Mix thoroughly. Put 1/3 C
of mixture on each tortilla and wrap up.
Place in greased 9x9 glass dish, seam side down. Pour milk over tortillas and cover with cheese. Bake at 350 for 25 minutes. Top with sour cream before
serving, if desired. Note: This can easily be doubled and made in a
9x13 glass dish. Today, I actually threw these in the Crock-pot on high for one hour, then on low for an additional hour. It was just too hot to turn the oven on, and it worked great!<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjwokkTcCRBcJVgnZ5h5DmmRnmW-kSvFbbbltHyXGk_ip5RfS-VLMb2BQhylsVMm3Mk4Bh7yQvEozlfU_D3-FAPMWDNkEarfVQKDo4P0pE4_004x4bG7cPtYltacAPlj5USG4MfshyQwHc/s1600/photo+(7).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjwokkTcCRBcJVgnZ5h5DmmRnmW-kSvFbbbltHyXGk_ip5RfS-VLMb2BQhylsVMm3Mk4Bh7yQvEozlfU_D3-FAPMWDNkEarfVQKDo4P0pE4_004x4bG7cPtYltacAPlj5USG4MfshyQwHc/s320/photo+(7).JPG" width="239" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
For dessert I made <a href="http://www.themodestmomblog.com/2012/02/cream-pie-recipe/" target="_blank">cream pie</a> and tossed some partially thawed frozen berries on top right before serving. I've never worked with gelatin before, and it's been years since I had to whip cream. I was a bit nervous about this turning out, but it tasted great! DH went back for seconds, so I'm assuming he really liked it as well :)<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiT7UX5VUSEqTls_eWW1ulNu6-R65NNjK3osDTJ9tVlSGI3Lwp8Ujig5zbIqroSqj_LElrWAoKDOx_iVOjUCK1sZEXLS_DbVgymOykoiDkdkZVLbtvngh-pA1XozdTvWJHvO9ZHQ7PSqjg/s1600/photo+(6).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="239" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiT7UX5VUSEqTls_eWW1ulNu6-R65NNjK3osDTJ9tVlSGI3Lwp8Ujig5zbIqroSqj_LElrWAoKDOx_iVOjUCK1sZEXLS_DbVgymOykoiDkdkZVLbtvngh-pA1XozdTvWJHvO9ZHQ7PSqjg/s320/photo+(6).JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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<br />KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-26628726673527952942013-07-08T09:53:00.000-05:002013-07-11T17:41:28.207-05:00Our Milestone Blessing<div class="MsoNormal">
I continued to be so humbled and amazed by how God is
aligning all the steps for us to adopt.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>After so many dark, lonely, and painful years, we see the light!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>If
you’ve been following on our journey (I doubt many have, as I struggle to
update this blog often!)<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>you know
that we’ve been saving for several years to begin this journey.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We started work on a homestudy in
November 2012, had an approved homestudy by March 2013, identified ‘our’
waiting child in April, and our dossier was shipped to Hong Kong on May 31<sup>st</sup>.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Currently, we are waiting to be
officially matched with this child, and then take the steps to secure a travel
date (!). </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>In
early June, we met a savings goal for this adoption - $25,000 total saved,
which should more or less cover all adoption expenses (including fees we have
already paid).</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>I
am still astounded as to how that happened…but I’ll do my best to explain how
we accomplished that.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>We
didn’t fundraise, ask people for money, or apply for grants.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not that we think there is anything
wrong with that, but our area and situation wasn’t conducive to fundraising, we
weren’t comfortable asking people for money, and by the time we were able to
look at grants it was clear that we didn’t need them.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>We
did: Live on one income (my husband’s) while saving mine (minus tithe and
taxes) for three years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The first
year, I was working around 20-25 hours per week; the next two years it was a
full 40 with the exception of summer and vacations. We saved part or all of any
money we were given as gifts. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
signed up to be a consultant for Lilla Rose, started playing organ for church
on occasion, and put those earnings into our adoption fund.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span>It
doesn’t sound like much, and I amazed by God’s blessing and provision to make
everything fall in place.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To Him
be the glory, honor, and praise, both now and forevermore!<br />
<br />
I am linking up with:<br />
<a href="http://www.themodestmomblog.com/" target="_blank"><br /></a>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://www.themodestmomblog.com/" target="_blank"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgway_2tfv_UGkZ0TOBYwgESSiiJNmf7jbUCtUQCAtLSNwdgRwtoOTXWVXFVxrPp2aIGQMddv8wA9PLe1UnUIXHgRGoFbXX6XLp8h9GsQWR_SwG8VSupe_mB5YaG-xrT1ilCfX0iSTVOP8/s1600/Modest-Mom-blog-button-copy.jpg" /></a></div>
<br /></div>
KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-14433266838964023682013-06-16T14:33:00.001-05:002013-06-16T14:33:34.501-05:00Father's DayI'm sure I've mentioned previously that my husband is a pastor. Today, as he was greeting our congregation leaving the sanctuary one sweet little boy wished him, "Happy Father's Day." <br />
<br />
My heart flipped over just a little, and I smiled.<br />
<br />
Happy Father's Day to fathers, father-to-be, and those who long to be a father.<br />
<br />
I continue to pray daily for the little one overseas that we have requested to make our child. I pray that he is safe, that his needs are being met, and that we may be matched and united with him soon. <br />
<br />
To our heavenly Father, God, be the glory, great things He has done!KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-62056661004782007792013-06-13T22:12:00.001-05:002013-06-13T22:12:54.335-05:00Catching Up and Random ThoughtsFirst things first: Adoption update. Last I posted, I was joyfully reporting that DH and I had identified a child that would like to proceed with adopting. Since then, we have received a request from the overseas partner agency to explain why we wanted to adopt this child (and fulfilled their request), gotten our biometrics fingerprints done, received our USCIS approval ONE WEEK after getting the fingerprints done, scrambled to assemble the dossier and line up a final reference letter, and sent our dossier to our agency. Our dossier was shipped to Hong Kong on May 31st!<br />
<br />
It is just short of a miracle that our USCIS approval came as quickly as it did. The timeframe we were given was five to eight weeks between fingerprints and approval. I never dared dream the government would be so efficient! I am still is joyful shock about that. Praise God!<br />
<br />
Now, we wait. We need to be approved by the Hong Kong government to adopt a child, and to be approved by the overseas agency to adopt this specific child. At that point we will be officially matched with this child. We've been told that will take two to four months from the dossier submission. Then we will wait for a court order and travel dates, which will likely take place either late winter or early spring. I am praying that we will travel in early March at the latest. "Our" child turns two around that time and I would love for him to celebrate his birthday with his mom and dad :), plus we will save ourselves the fees and hassle of updating our homestudy. <br />
<br />
Finally, my random thought: You know you're a pre-adoptive parent if the first thing you grab to take to the basement during a tornado warning is the expandable file with copies of your homestudy and dossier. ;)KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-88748839252208396162013-05-06T17:12:00.002-05:002013-06-13T22:14:48.483-05:00April 23rd<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Oh, my. Oh,
Lord – You are too good to us.
Your works are wonderful!
Truly, You know the plans you have for us!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
WE HAVE IDENTIFIED OUR CHILD!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I NEVER expected this to happen so quickly and as easily as
it did. Let me tell the wonderful
story….</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
One week ago today (April 16<sup>th</sup>), my car was in the shop for some minor
repairs and routine maintenance. My husband was taking that day (a Tuesday) off
instead of his usual Monday due to some schedule changes, so he picked me up
from work, took me to a doctor appointment for a manipulation on my neck and
upper back, then drove us to pick up my car and get some dinner. On the way to the auto shop, I checked
my e-mail on my phone and saw that we had a message in our private online
adoption “portal” with the subject title “Waiting Child”. This intrigued me…What <i>about</i> a waiting child, I wondered? It was hard to wait to get home and see
the actual message. <br />
<!--[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]--><br />
<!--[endif]--></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When I was able to access it, this is what I read:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Hi D and K,<br />
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">We received a new referral through
our partner in Hong Kong, and thought of your family. I wondered if you may
want to take a look? If so, I am posting [child’s] referral here, [your social worker] is aware of this
as well. Let me know your thoughts.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">Then I looked at
the child study. This is a more
in-depth summary of a child than you would find in a photolisting, but not a
complete medical report. In this
case, I learned this child’s gender, birthdate, medical diagnoses, and birth
family background. We didn’t have
a preference on the gender. I did
review the birth family background, but honestly, it doesn’t have any bearing
on our decision to consider a particular child or not. The list of medical diagnoses was
tricky – Hong Kong uses lots of British English medical terms that are tricky
to ‘translate’, so there were several things we were unsure about, but we
weren’t alarmed by any of the medical information. The birth date was significant – I’ll get to that in a bit.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">After taking a
couple days to research things to the best of our ability, I called our
doctor’s office to make an appointment to discuss this child’s file on Thursday
(the 18<sup>th</sup>). <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">We met with our
doctor on Monday the 22<sup>nd</sup> and were encouraged. Lots of the things we couldn’t figure
out were not a big deal, just variations of normal. He did say that this little guy looks “syndromic’, meaning
he has the look and several anomalies that point to a possible genetic
disorder. I felt compelled to move
forward. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">My husband kept
asking me if I was ‘sure’. I
couldn’t say a certain ‘yes’. I
mean, it seems that in my (overly-realistic? pessimistic?) mind that I can never give a certain
answer. There is always a shred of
doubt that holds me back. It was
there when I chose a college, when I declared a major both times, on my wedding
day, with job changes, etc. And that
ever-present little shred of doubt was still there, even though I wanted so
badly to leap forward shouting, “Yes!”
We decided it would be wise to sleep on it at least one night before
contacting our agency with an answer.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">The next morning
(Tuesday the 23<sup>rd</sup>), I awoke at 5 a.m. thanks to our very active sump
pump. I had fallen asleep thinking
about this child, and my thought was, “I want to say yes.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">I shared that
with my husband when I arrived home from work, and he agreed. We sent our agency the glorious message, “We
would like to proceed!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">Our little one is
a boy, just over a year old. We
are awaiting our USCIS approval so we can send in our dossier. Our estimated time from dossier
submission to being formally matched is 2-4 months (he is not "officially" ours until then), and we will travel 7-12 months after that. Urgh – more waiting! It is going to be so hard to know he is
growing without us. Ideally, we’d
travel in January. I am going to
pray that we travel by early March at the latest, as that would save us the
hassle and fee to update our home study.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">And his
birthdate…I just cannot go without mentioning this vignette that demonstrates
how my God does <i>all things well</i>. I had often heard from adoptive mamas
that there was some special ESP about the day their child was born. I basically considered that to be an
exaggeration. But God! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">The day our child
was born, I was despairing. I had
been having a very strange period that week. It came on time, but was extremely light and remained that
way for 4-5 days. I was going
crazy wondering if it was implantation bleeding from a pregnancy. I both did and didn’t want to be
pregnant. I wanted to be a mother in whatever way God saw fit to answer my
prayers, but I was also so sure we were going to adopt at that point. I knew if I was pregnant, I would need
to grieve again, this time for the adopted child we wouldn’t have at the time. I went back and forth all week,
debating to test or not to test, wondering what to pray for, struggling between
hope and dread for conception and adoption alike. I got two hours of sleep a night for three days straight and
ended up leaving work early on that third day because I felt terrible, but
picking up a pregnancy test on my way home.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">I tested the next
morning. Negative. And I wept for both relief and sorrow,
pain and peace. I both thanked God
and was angry at him. My full
flow, of course, began later that day (and continued for 8 days afterward)….<br />
<!--[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]--><br />
<!--[endif]--><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">…and halfway
around the world, our son was born.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">Oh Lord. Who knows what He was trying to do with
that lining up of events. Perhaps
it was a final test of my faith in the midst of infertility, or to prepare my
heart for the rocky road of international adoption, or simply to strengthen
me. One thing is certain – He worked out for the best and for His glory.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">As all great
gifts from heaven do.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<!--EndFragment-->KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-33577682242950069242013-04-04T19:03:00.000-05:002013-04-04T19:03:43.694-05:00Clean Sweep!
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
When I first saw the introduction to the “Clean Sweep”
series over on Caroline’s blog, I was intrigued, but not motivated. I thought that surely I didn’t have the
time and evergy while working full-time (and burning out fast as the end of the
school year approaches!).</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Then I saw her first challenge of creating a morning
routine, and thought, ‘I could use that.”
Then I saw her organization of her boys’ bedrooms and thought, “Maybe I
could learn how to spring clean from this challenge.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So, consider me counted in!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<u><i><br /></i></u></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<u><i>Morning Routine</i></u></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Rise</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Eat breakfast</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Brush teeth</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Shower or wash face</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Get dressed, makeup (except Saturday)</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Walk the dog</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Make bed</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I tried this for the first time today and I thought it
worked well! Hopefully that can
continue!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I would also like to set an evening routine, as that is the
time I have a lot to get done and it’s easy to forget things. Here’s the blueprint I followed last
night, and am working on tonight:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Walk dog</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Prepare/eat dinner</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Dishes and general kitchen clean-up</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Make a lunch (Sun – Thurs)</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>One hour of free time for computer, TV, or ‘fun’ reading</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Power90 workout (5 days per week Monday through Saturday)</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Snack, take vitamins</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Shower & brush/floss teeth</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Lay out clothes for tomorrow</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Bible reading</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Take dog out if my husband hasn’t</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Free time until I crash <span style="font-family: Wingdings;">:)</span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Wingdings;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I will strive to post weekly updates here. I will share a general list of things
I’d like to do this month, and get done what I can as well as whatever else I
think needs doing. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My general goal
is to get one cleaning/organizing task done per day (except Sundays and the
last two Saturdays of this month when we will be otherwise occupied). This will be in addition to regular
daily and weekly cleaning duties. My spiritual goals will be 1) to read 3-5 chapters of Scripture daily (save for Sundays) and to read a chapter of <u>Church Fellowship</u> by John Brug each week. This is the book we are working through in Bible Study, and I'd love to keep up in the study.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Yesterday, I went through the refrigerator and threw out old
yucky items. Thankfully, there
weren’t many, but I did toss some homemade Italian dressing from awhile back, a
green smoothie that got hidden back in…January…(I know, ICK!), and ¾ of a jar
of salsa that neither of us liked.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Today, I actually washed out the inside of the fridge and
cleaned out the freezer! I tossed
three things that were over a year old (freezer pickles from summer 2011, bread
crumbs, and something else that was in a Ziploc bag).</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Other things that I would love to get accomplished this
month:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Dog poop clean-up in the yard</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Wash curtains</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Wash bedding</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Go through clothes…and actually take them to Goodwill</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Put more mulch in the flowerbed</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Sweep out and straighten up the garage</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
De-clutter movie shelf</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Re-arrange the living room furniture</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Figure out a better system for shoes and coats in the
entryway and front closet</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
De-clutter cabinet in guest bedroom</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
De-clutter storage boxes under the bed</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I think that’s a good start!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="http://www.themodestmomblog.com/2013/04/clean-sweep-new-blog-series-and-challenge-for-april/" target="_blank"><img src="http://www.themodestmomblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/Clean-Sweep-Blog-Button.jpg"></a></div>
<!--EndFragment-->KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-86535562278073110592013-02-28T19:47:00.000-06:002013-02-28T19:51:47.147-06:00Draining, Rejoicing, Thanking<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
The past few weeks have been draining.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It’s Lent, so my husband has two sermons to write and
memorize each week instead of one.
I fill in as organist more often to relieve the burden on our one
regular church organist. Our
church has received a request to form a dual parish with another church of our
fellowship (located 30 miles away), so there’s been a lot of conversation on
that. Work has been just exhausting for me. The kids have been SO wired and loud and crazy. Finally, of course, there is adoption
paperwork. We thought we were
‘done’ with the home study, only to have our social worker request scans of
certain dossier documents before she wrote it. Understandable, but hard for us to do in this busy season,
in which we are struggling to find time to sit down <i>together </i>and get any sort of serious decisions made.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We may be changing our country choice, which would mean
switching to another agency for placement after our home study is done and in
our hands. I don’t know what our
home study (current) agency will think or do about that, but we have to do
what’s right for us. We never were
‘decided’ on country choice (just ‘declared’), can’t see how any of their
country programs are going to work for us, and they have been questioning our
declaration since we made it, encouraging us to continue elsewhere. No decisions have been made – at this
point, the goal is to simply get the home study done and go from there. But it’s something needing to be
carefully thought over, something else to consider amidst this very mentally
full schedule of ours.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It was a wonderful day for some special friends of ours and
the adoption of their baby girl was finalized in court today. Yesterday was a grand day for the
sister of an online acquaintance, as they received word that they will soon be
parents of twin 3-year-old boys. I
admit, my first, knee-jerk reaction was to cry out of pure selfishness. What wasn’t it OUR turn? WE’ve been waiting for over six years
for children; these couples had only been waiting about four years each. When, Lord, will it
be MY time?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Yes, selfish.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My struggle today is to rejoice in their triumphs. And as both couples praise God for
answered prayers, I look to focus on my prayers that have been answered, instead of whining about the big one that hasn’t yet received my desired answer.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I prayed long and hard for a significant other…boyfriend or
fiancé or husband…and was blessed with my wonderful man, with whom I went from
dating to engaged to married in less than ten months. Many times, while working long, stressful hours to support
my husband through Seminary, I pleaded with God that it would end. It did. I asked my Heavenly Father for my husband’s vicarage (internship)
to be someplace warm, and his first Call to be somewhere back in the
Midwest. YES on both counts, and
oh my, what joyful days those were!
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
There has also been an unexpected blessing that I never
asked for when we decided, rather suddenly, to get a dog last November. I cannot even begin to express the joy
she has brought us! She has been
such a loving, nurturing, healing balm to my hurting heart over the last several
months. We have asked ourselves
several times, “Why did we wait so long to get a dog?” only to realize that, if
we hadn’t waited, we wouldn’t have <b>this</b> one. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
What a fitting prelude to our future adoption.</div>
<!--EndFragment-->KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-86888963344895308592013-02-07T20:15:00.001-06:002013-02-07T20:16:22.132-06:00February Song(The title of this post is borrowed from the lovely Josh Groban work, "February Song.")<br />
<br />
Oh, February. I think it's always been my least favorite month. First off, there's the weather. Gray, cloudy, slushy, muddy, and cold. It really depresses me, to the point that I bought a therapy lamp last year. Also, growing up, I hated Valentine's Day because I had no Valentine. Of course, that changed when I got married. My husband also happens to have a February birthday, which is something to look forward to. In 2010-2011 we spent a year in the subtropics and I found I LOVED February. The weather was absolutely beautiful. It was quite the contrast to February in the upper Midwest, which we are now back to. Gloom, gray, and cold.<br />
<br />
It's kind of a fitting picture. While it feels much better to be actually 'in-process' with adoption, it still feels stagnant. We put so much work and time into the home study, only to move on to the more intensive dossier. We declared a country (Hong Kong), only to still feel completely undecided about where we are adopting from. As our social worker and the country representative have continued to constantly remind us, it is a program that only has children with moderate-major, lifelong special needs available. I think we are both afraid of moving one step forward, only to take two steps back.<br />
<br />
The point of my post here was to provide a bit of an update on our adoption status, as well as our mental and emotional states. I guess I've done that. You can see that things are moving, but we are as uncertain and fearful as ever.<br />
<br />
God is in control, and He knows what He is doing. His strength is made perfect in our weaknesses. I can rest in that.KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-701258358219302012013-01-12T22:00:00.001-06:002013-01-12T22:00:53.196-06:00Post-HolidayWell, it's 2013.<br />
<br />
Every time the date changes, it's a struggle for me. We married in very late 2006 with the intention of not using birth control, thinking that we surely would have a baby or be expecting by our one-year anniversary. <br />
<br />
I very clearly remember being on my knees, in tears, at my in-laws' house during Christmas 2007. I so desperately wanted a child and we had not received that blessing, despite being open to receive it as soon as God would give it. Meantime, my brother-in-law and his wife were at that Christmas celebration with their baby girl...let's just say it hurt.<br />
<br />
It's five years later....Five years in which I thought, SURELY, we would be able to conceive and have a child at some point. This has not been the case. Adoptions usually take place in less than five years; unfortunately, we were not able to start that until just this past year due to all the moving around we'd have to do.<br />
<br />
Holidays work like that changing date - a glaring reminder that time has passed, and that desire of my heart is still not mine. I find the period after Christmas to be especially tough. We've had time with family, trying to save face when people hint about 'why we don't have kids yet', the year changes shortly after Christmas, and then there's the post-holiday withdrawal from the season, from family time, along with the scramble of unpacking/laundry/finding homes for gifts/cleaning/getting back to work.<br /><br />This year, we're having an extra-difficult time with (STILL) trying to choose a child/country. To make me feel even worse, that same brother-in-law and his wife had their second child this morning. It hurts. I realize I'm being sinful and selfish, but I want to share my feelings here. Their two children are nearly six years apart in age - the same amount of time we've been married - and it's a very obvious reminder of our failure to become parents (either by birth or adoption) in that time. I saw pictures of the baby being held my his grandparents - my husband's parents - on Facebook, and my heart broke. They are the joy and center of my mother-in-law's life, and I completely fail to add to her joy.<br />
<br />
I realize this isn't a happy post :( Please forgive me. Please keep us in your prayers, that we may soon have a decision and some direction, and that some day I will be able to read this and think, "It was worth it."KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-11853327856969324902012-12-23T19:30:00.004-06:002012-12-23T19:31:23.707-06:00Our Christmas Letter (partial)These were the closing paragraphs in our Christmas letter this year. My husband wrote it :)<br /><br />"<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">That basically brings us up to the present day, as
far as highlights of our year. So, we turn our attention to the future. When
you reach a certain age and a certain amount of time of being married, you
inevitably hear many questions about the future of your family. One of the
unfortunate realities of being a clergy family is that no topic is off limits
for questioning. The increase of such inquiries here has reminded us that very
likely many of our family and friends are also wondering about the future of
our family. That’s only natural.</span><div>
<span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;"><br /></span></span>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;"><span style="line-height: 115%;"> Please
note that what follows is not public knowledge. Many family members and friends
do not know about this and we ask that you don’t discuss this unless you are absolutely
certain the people you wish to discuss it with have knowledge of this
situation. Please also recognize that this is not something which we wish to
discuss unless we bring it up. I hope all that </span></span><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">doesn't</span></span><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif; font-size: small;"><span style="line-height: 115%;"> sound harsh; it
certainly </span><span style="line-height: 18px;">isn't</span><span style="line-height: 115%;"> meant to! It is simply a painful topic.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">For
reasons we will never know</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"> in this life, the Lord has not blessed us with
children. This is not by our choosing. We wanted as many children as God would
give us. The pain and difficulty of the past 6 years of infertility have
brought us to the point of actively pursuing adoption. The time frame is
uncertain and will remain so for some time. We are currently working with
*an awesome, truly Christian agency* in the hopes of securing an international adoption.
This presents many, many obstacles – not the least of which is the several tens
of thousands of dollars that an adoption costs (the reason K continues to
work full-time), and the time off to travel - which I may or may not have.
However, Lord willing, those things will work out and sometime in the (not too
distant?) future we will be able bring a child into a loving home.<br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> So
it is that we look to the future of our earthly life with the hopes that our
little family will expand. We do this even as this Christmas season we remember
the coming of our Savior and look to His final return which will end this vale
of tears for all Christians.<br /><br /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;"> We
wish you our Savior’s richest blessings this holiday season and always. It is
our prayer that you will be strengthened in faith in Christ through which we
possess forgiveness of all our sin, comfort for all trials in this life, and
everlasting life in the world to come.<br /><br />Love,<br />D&K"<o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-46395530495490856872012-12-12T20:49:00.003-06:002012-12-12T20:50:13.773-06:00WearyToday I am weary.<br />
<br />
I think there are a myriad of reason for my weariness. First off, I'm simply tired. It's hard to work a 40-hour week outside the home, walk the dog for a hour every day, keep a house in order, keep up with organ practice, run a side business (Lilla Rose), and do Christmas prep tasks. Of course, I've also got a dear husband and a sweet puppy dog to care for.<br />
<br />
I'm a bit mentally drained from the home study process. We got all the paperwork and three of the four interviews done in less than three weeks. I'm thrilled that we were efficient, and I'm relieved that it's almost done, but in the aftermath of all that work, my mind is exhausted.<br />
<br />
Finally, there's the emotional weariness. Oh, I'm feeling emotions. I'm scared. I fear things falling through, us never becoming parents, and losing tens of thousands of dollars in the process. I am afraid of not being a good mom. I am scared of not being able to attach to my future child, or provide for their medical needs, or properly handle institutional behaviors. There's so many unknowns in international adoption, and the reality of them is finally settling in for me. I'm finding them frightening, and it's tiring.<br />
<br />
I would also like to share two specific prayer requests - well, they're kind of two-in-one. First, that God would send us some kind of clear vision as to which country we should choose. We are really struggling with that one. I went so far as to say the other day, "This is too big for us. I just want someone else to decide for us."<br /><br />Second - there's a precious child of God on our agency's private photolisting that has my heart. I've known their picture for a few weeks now and have prayed for this particular little one. Our agency seems excited about our interest in this particular child. We've gotten their medical history and felt that, although the diagnoses were many, all of this child's needs were either correctable or manageable. However, we then brought this medical report to our doctors. One diagnosis has the potential to be far more involved than we imagined. It's not a deal-breaker for me (though I fear it may be for my husband), but it makes the decision more difficult. <br /><br />Please pray that the Lord would give us clear, solid direction. I pray that I will see children through His eyes, not our human ones.KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-90763629013281167812012-12-01T13:17:00.001-06:002012-12-01T13:18:22.776-06:00Christmas IdeasI often get asked for Christmas gift ideas at this time of year. It's fun to receive gifts, and I appreciate that both my family and my in-laws are big gift-givers. Of course, it's not the most important part of the holiday, but it is fun!<br />
<br />
It's been such a challenge to come up with ideas this year, though. Some gift cards, a new sweatshirt, and a couple new kitchen items would be nice. However, I'm stuck beyond that. Honestly - yes I'd love a dishwasher, but that's a bit much to ask for.<br />
<br />
The point is, I'm not desiring much at all this Christmas. I recently figured out why.<br />
<br />
It's because the desire of my heart can't come in a box wrapped in shiny paper. The desire of my heart is living in an orphanage or foster care in Hong Kong, South Korea, or Uganda. And I most certainly long for that blessed little desire to be enjoying his or her first Christmas with us, in his or her forever home, in 2013.KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-65916444761216466212012-11-22T18:13:00.002-06:002012-11-22T18:14:16.285-06:00Blessed Thanksgiving!<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 13.5pt;">Most individuals that struggle with infertility will tell you that
holidays are hard. I’m one of them. They are an annual marker of more time
passed, and I’m still not a mama.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 13.5pt;">This Thanksgiving was definitely more joyful than previous ones,
however, as we spent much of it filling out adoption study paperwork!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 13.5pt;">I indicated in my
last post that we were re-considering domestic adoption, as well as an
international adoption, with a new agency. We were pre-approved for Bulgaria,
Colombia, Ethiopia, Ghana, Hong Kong, and Uganda. We could also choose to adopt
from South Korea or South Africa. God used a variety of factors to lead us to international adoption (again).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 13.5pt;">The week before
Thanksgiving, we submitted our formal application, received formal
approval, and made our first payment to our agency. The services contract and notice of privacy
practices were printed, signed, and mailed out.
Once again, we’re in this for real!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 13.5pt;">Last Friday, we got a call from our social worker asking if we
would be able to get one of our home visits done on Tuesday. Um, yes!
Our agency’s “local” office is over three hours away, but she was going
to be in our area. That worked out so
nicely! She was here from seven o’clock
to about eight-thirty. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 13.5pt;">We felt very comfortable with her and were able to get quite a bit of
work done on our home study! We signed
their discipline policy, statement of faith, and a host of other papers that I
can’t remember. She went through some of
the early phases of interviews, which including asking us what led us to pursue
international adoption, what led us to where we live now, our support networks,
and what we know about international adoption.
I was very proud and encouraged by her responses. She said that our perceptions were wonderful
and that she is excited for us! Our
social worker also did the walk-through of our home already. We knew it was a possibility, so we had
cleaned and straightened things up and whatnot.
Honestly, it was very laid back and comfortable, and the state of my home didn’t seem to
be a big deal. She was looked at every
room, asked where our future child’s room would be, and wanted to ensure that
we had enough smoke detectors. It was
impressive to her that we had a carbon monoxide detector. And that was it! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 13.5pt;">Of course, we have much more work ahead of us. We have to send our background check
authorizations to every state we’ve lived in over the past five years (that
would be four of them). There are
physical forms to be completed at the doctor’s office, big questionnaires with
invasive questions, a health insurance affidavit, a financial checklist, family
history forms, and a few more things I’m forgetting. We will also need to decide who we will name
as legal guardians for our child should we die – that’s going to be a tough
one. I honestly had never thought of
that, but it makes sense that they need that information! Meanwhile, our social worker will be
contacting our personal, work, and pastor references and scheduling two or
three more interviews with us. Finally
(I think?) we have to complete 30 hours of adoptive parent education throughout
this entire process, and at least 10 hours must be done be the home study can
be complete. Education hours can be completed
in a variety of ways: Adoption seminars, reading books, webinars, talking with
other adoptive families, etc. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: medium;">Of course, we also need to do this little thing called “making a
decision” on what country to adopt from.
It’s going to be tough. We have
been able to eliminate Colombia, Ghana, and South Africa from consideration as
we cannot fulfill their travel requirements. Bulgaria and Ethiopia are out as
the ages of their adoptable children aren't very compatible with the ages we
are seeking. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 13.5pt;">That leaves us with Uganda, South Korea, and Hong Kong. All three contenders have advantages as well as significant challenges for us.
Next week, I will be calling our agency’s program coordinators for these
countries to get further information.
Our social worker will also be sending us a medical conditions checklist
that may help us determine what special needs we can consider, which may also
help us determine which country has those types of children.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: medium;">Once our home study is complete, I will begin getting some grant
applications submitted. I know I've stopped doing updates on our adoption fund, but it’s around $16,000 right now
(we spent $300 on application fees with our first agency, $550 to apply with
our agency, $110 on renewing my passport and $140 on a passport for my
husband). We are looking at spending somewhere
between $20,000 and $38,000 on this entire process, so we will need to find a
way to come up with more funds.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;">
<span style="font-size: 13.5pt;">In closing, we are certainly thankful today. We are thankful for the transition from ‘infertile/unknown’
to ‘prospective adoptive parents.’ We realize that we are VERY fortunate to
have saved a good amount towards our adoption at this point. God is so generous. For all He has blessed us with, for the
ultimate blessing of His Son, Jesus, and simply for who He is – we give thanks
to Him.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-19525969284185909512012-10-27T20:28:00.000-05:002012-10-28T15:25:14.031-05:00ChangesFirst off, I want to share about a big, fun giveaway that a sweet acquaintance of mine is doing! Caroline is a fellow Lilla Rose consultant and blogs at www.themodestmomblog.com She also runs an online store with skirts, shells, and other great clothing items. I have two skirts and three layering shells from her and love them all! She is changing the name of her business to Deborah & Co. to reflect her service to all women, not just moms. To celebrate this, she's having a great giveaway! Go check it out at <a href="http://www.themodestmomblog.com/2012/10/huge-giveaway-even-bigger-announcement/">http://www.themodestmomblog.com/2012/10/huge-giveaway-even-bigger-announcement/</a><br />
<br />
Next, an update on us. In my last post, I shared that we were back to the drawing board with domestic adoption, as well as my fears and misgivings about it. Well, God. I just love how full of surprises He can be! We are on two waiting lists to begin a domestic adoption, but also working on a formal application for international adoption as well. <br />
<br />
You see, one of the agencies that we're working with for domestic also does international adoptions. When we had our initial telephone conference with them earlier this week, she really encouraged us to fill out a pre-application for international as well since we were so drawn to it. We explained that we weren't sure if any of their country programs would accept us (due to age/length of marriage/history of mental health diagnoses), or if we could meet the travel requirements or needs of children available in the countries we did qualify for. She very gently persuaded us to fill out the free pre-application to see what we would qualify for and to go from there. <br />
<br />
I'm so glad we did! We are pre-approved for seven of their country programs. Now, none of them are "ideal" in terms of having children with needs we feel we can meet, or travel requirements that would be 'easy' for us to fulfill, but we have decided to proceed. We've decided to let God get to work and are praying hard that He will lead us to the child He's chosen for us.<br />
<br />
And yes, we have already asked to see their discipline policy. I cried when I read it..for relief. I was so relieved it was something we could sign, and relieved that there <i>are</i> still Christian agencies that adhere to Scripture. The whole policy was so beautifully written, we couldn't have come up with a more perfectly stated, Christ-centered, discipline philosophy. We are so impressed with this new agency thus far!<br />
<br />
Hopefully, we will have some more direction in the form of our agency's opinion next week. As always, we would graciously appreciate your prayers!KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-80590229790736833832012-10-21T20:00:00.003-05:002012-10-27T20:28:54.603-05:00The News isn't Good<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Well.<br />
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It’s bittersweet to see my last post on the main page of my
blog. What a joyful time that was! Unfortunately, it was very short-lived. This last month has been a rough one as I've struggled to get a handle on the raging emotions of a dream shattered.<br />
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We sent in our pre-application paperwork on Sept. 20<sup>th</sup>, and received word a week and a half later that we were pre-approved. Minutes later, we received “phase 2” of
homestudy paperwork via e-mail. Included
in that was a “corporal punishment policy statement” that we were required to
sign. It stated, “We find any type of physical
punishment completely unacceptable and will refrain from using it at all times.” Now, I understand that a lot of people would
have been fine with that, but we’re not.
We are Bible-following Christians. God’s Word presents physical punishment as
something parents should use in disciplining their children. We realize that the psyche of a child who has
suffered loss is different than one who has not, and would certainly be aware
of and sensitive to that in trying to work out how the best method of
discipline. However, we cannot in good conscience completely write off
something that God has commanded us to do. Of course, we also couldn't lie and sign it anyways - that would also be wrong. <br />
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(And just to clarify, we were both spanked as children. We completely disagree with hitting a child
to vent your own anger at them, physical punishment that leaves marks, or using
spanking as the first and only form of discipline. We believe in physical discipline applied calmly as a loving correction. )</div>
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<br /></div>
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I looked at the research this agency cited and was
appalled. She stated that (I’m
paraphrasing here as it was a video) she finds ALL types of punitive discipline
unacceptable because that is not how God disciplines. What?
God sends those who reject Him to hell.
He punished His own Son, in our place, on the cross. He punished the Israelites with years
wandering in the desert. We are so
saddened that this false doctrine was being proclaimed in such high regard, and
that this personal opinion was being touted as research. Unbelievable.</div>
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<br /></div>
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With my heart breaking in two, I e-mailed and asked for our
file to be closed. We’ve lost our
non-refundable pre-application fee of $300.
We checked into our two other agency options for an international
adoption from South Korea – they have the same policy. And all three of these agencies label
themselves as “Christian”. Oh, Lord…….the
lies break my heart, I can’t imagine how much they hurt You.<br />
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We took a week to breathe (more for my hubby) and grieve
(for me). Honestly, I can truly say that
week was the worst of my life. There was
this adoption door slamming shut, then we had a horrific crisis rise out of the
blue in my extended family, then we had a sweet friend of ours pass away (not
suddenly) from stomach cancer. It was
awful. </div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We’re re-visiting domestic right now. I’ll be honest, it was not my first choice
and still isn’t. I’m terrified of open
adoption, I’m terrified of not being chosen by a birthmother, and I’m terrified
of attaching to an infant placed with it, and then fear having to give him/her
back if the birthmother changes her mind within the 96-hour waiting
period. It wears me out, emotionally,
just thinking about how draining this process is going to be. In the end, though, we know that the
potential end result would be worth all the anguish. It’s our last shot at parenthood…we may as
well throw everything we have into it.
We narrowed it down to two domestic placement agencies, and both of them
have waiting lists right now (waiting list to start your homestudy, not just to be
chosen as adoptive parents). We are on both of them and will
go with whoever opens up first. In a
way, that takes the pressure off of us…I feel like, this way, it’s truly in God’s
hands to make that decision.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My husband thinks that God used this to keep us from a
disruption further along in an international adoption. I think it may have been a test similar to
the one God gave Abraham, when God told Abraham to sacrifice his beloved son on
an altar. I think God may have been
testing us in a similar way, “How important are children to you? More important than following My commands?”
Important, but not that important. Not
enough to go against His Word – either by not disciplining His way, or by lying
and signing that form anyways. So there’s
Your answer God….Speak, Your servants are listening.</div>
KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-75168019547270238092012-09-15T18:24:00.003-05:002012-10-27T20:29:09.731-05:00The Lord is in the Details<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Well, it’s been a week – in a good way! We are in this for real, as in – we have officially
pre-applied for international adoption!</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
This has not been done without hesitance or fear or
concerns. I’ll save those for another post. We’re taking a leap of faith here, and we’re
cool with that. I believe that God wants
us to be parents, and that He desperately wants orphans to become part of
Christian families.</div>
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<br /></div>
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Last weekend I joyfully began filling out the
pre-application. I hunted down 4x6
photos of us and of our home. I dug out
our last three years of tax returns and made copies of page one of each of
them. We read the lengthy “adoption
services agreement” and went to the bank to get it signed and notarized. Four non-relatives – each of whom knew we’d
been unable to have biological children and were supportive of adoption – were contacted
and asked if they were willing to be ‘non-relative personal references’ for us. Lastly, we wrote a $300 check for the
pre-application fee and mailed it off.</div>
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<br /></div>
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God is already giving us little things that assure us we
have His blessing. Number one – we completed
this paperwork on Sept. 12. It was 11
years <i>to the day</i> that my sweet
cousins were scheduled to come home from Russia. Wow, that was an emotional realization – but in
the most wonderful way! The second
assurance we got was when I received an e-mail reply from our (well, soon-to-be
‘our’) social worker saying that she had <i>no
</i>other homestudies in progress at this time, so we could get that done
pretty quickly if we wanted to! Oh
Jesus! You are too good to us!</div>
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<br /></div>
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Finally, we’d been told to plan on getting three certified
copies of our marriage certificate (and birth certificates) for the homestudy, and I need a fourth marriage certificate to renew my passport (it expires
in February, and I’ve gotten married since, so proof of change
in surname is required). I didn’t want to wait 4-6
weeks for the copies to come before sending in passport renewal paperwork, but
I also wasn’t thrilled about sending our only copy to the U.S. government and
trusting them to not lose it. This
morning I was filling out the request for copies and went to dig out our
existing copy to make sure everything matched.
Um, <i>we have two copies!</i> I just squealed,<i> </i> “We have two!”
I have no recollection of two, just one.
But this is wonderful, because now I feel perfectly fine sending one of
those off with my passport renewal paperwork.
</div>
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<br /></div>
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Thank you, Lord!</div>
KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6445693634718505587.post-9402310679869245602012-09-09T21:33:00.001-05:002012-09-09T21:33:28.209-05:00Thy Will Be Done<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
These are the words that I wished I could say and mean
during our earlier days of our infertility.
They are, after all, words from the Lord’s Prayer, which Jesus modeled
for us after saying, “This is how you should pray.” It’s what my pastors taught me to close our
prayers with. I was often told, “God’s
will is best.” And believed it. But once tougher times in life came upon me,
it was hard to get those words out, and it was even harder to mean them when I
spoke them.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
As mentioned in my earliest post, I have a psychology
degree. It was not my original
major. In fact, I often feel like I didn’t
earn this degree because I only spent the last of my four college years as a
psych major, I was a nursing major for
the first three years. To make a long,
sad, and painful story short, I burned out when a major depression arose in me,
stemming from family problems and severe stress. I was on meds, in therapy, etc. and simply
did not have the presence of mind needed to ‘perform’ up to par in clinicals
during that third year. After two
marginal passes, my options were to appeal or accept defeat. I am still amazed at how peacefully and clearly
I was able to understand all the signs from God that this season in my life was
done, and walk away.</div>
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<br /></div>
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I did not make this decision without pain, and certainly
spent several months grieving this loss.
I remember often wondering why God would lead me down that path in the
first place, if only to fail. My answer
(or at least, what I think is the answer) came a few months after I withdrew
from the nursing program. </div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I still had a certified nursing assistant’s license and held
a job at a hospital in the area. One
July night, I helped take care of a young man, just a few years older than I,
who was being treated for a severe broken leg and broken arm. He had gotten those injuries in a car crash,
where he was driving drunk and the person he hit was killed. When I stepped in to say I was done for the
night, he was frantically flipping through Bible with tears in his eyes. “I have to know that I can be forgiven,” he
told me. He noticed the gold cross
necklace that I was wearing and asked, “Where should I read?” </div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My heart broke for him.
“I would start with the Psalms,” I said, squeezing his hand. “I will be back in the morning, and I will
pray for you.”</div>
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<br /></div>
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The next morning, I was assigned to that same bank of
rooms. When I entered his, he handed me
a piece of paper. He had a soft smile
and tears in his eyes, the look of someone too choked up to speak. <br />
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The paper read, “I felt God last night. He forgives me and loves me. I believe in Him.” The young man choked out a, “Thank you,” as I
reached for his hand again, and my own eyes filled with tears. Oh, the power of God’s Word! It is so easy to forget how strong it is,
until we see it in action, bringing sinners to faith.</div>
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<br /></div>
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Several days after this, it dawned on me that had I not been
a nursing major, I would not have had that CNA job, and I would never have been
there for that young man being brought to faith. There have, or course, been times since then
when my sinful nature has asked, “Was it all really worth it for just one
man to receive faith?” </div>
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“<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">Just
so, I tell you, there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who<span class="apple-converted-space"> </span></span>repents than over ninety-nine<span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>righteous persons who need no repentance.”
(Luke 15:7 ESV). </div>
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So, yes. Worth it ALL.</div>
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If God’s will was for me to endure my tough years in nursing
school just to be available to witness to that young man, so be it. It's hard to feel this way – but the
Bible verse above clearly illustrates how precious and important it is to God
for unbelievers to repent, and come to a knowledge of the truth. <br />
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Thy Will Be Done.</div>
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And in the same way, the more I look into our future as (hopefully) parents by adoption, the more I see how God may have allowed us to suffer through
infertility, in order to lead us to adopt a child who otherwise would have grown up as an
orphan – or worse, a child that would have otherwise not been baptized or heard
God’s Word. And if that is how he works
our lives to His glory, so be it. <br /><br />If
that is how He intends to bring another soul to faith in Him, may it be
so. <br /><br />If we are to be His instruments in
this blessed manner – speak, O Lord, for your servants are listening. <br /><br />As the familiar hymn goes, "What God ordains is always good."</div>
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May God’s will alone be done.</div>
KLhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07148620910596140914noreply@blogger.com0